Confused and alone

[LinkCelestrial]

I read that first paragraph, put down my iPod and angry paced around the house till I regained my composure.

This is emotional abuse. He is invalidating your pain by bitching about his. That's completely intolerable and you shouldn't have to put up with it.

Show him the pay check you're bringing home and compare it to his. Show him the stuff you bought and the rent you paid and tell him to get his head out of his ass and see THAT HE ISN'T PROVIDING .poo.! You are NOT going to carry his sorry ass. He sure as hell isn't going to tell you everything is his. THE .love. DID HE PAY FOR? WHAT HAS HE BEEN PROVIDING? If he still pulls the "this is mine, that is mine, blah blah" BULLSHIT then say fine. You can keep that. Now pay me back for the rent and food I've been providing and I'll be on my way. I feel very strongly that no competent judge/jury would look at this and award him .poo. (okay so the justice system is a little messed up and he'll get some stuff but show the paychecks and where the rent comes from and what he blows his money on and you'll have a damn fine case).

It sounds like you want to be reasonable. Make that clear. Also make it clear that if he isn't reasonable you have THE RIGHT (yeah, the right) to take what you like and walk out. I'd like to emphasize that /you are/ getting out. Unless he find Jesus (which he'd probably bullshit anyways) he is not coming around and he is not getting anymore chances. I'm your mother now, that's how it is. (Okay I'm not your mother I'm just saying this /needs/ to end.)

I'd like to say one more thing, be firm with him. You don't have to stoop to his level and get in screaming matches (but if you do I'm not judging. I'd be at that level already). But be firm. If you starts bitching about how it has impacted him/will impact him shut him the .love. down. You're the one that's leaving, you're the one HE (yeah it's his fault!) has driven to these levels. You have given him more than he deserves. If you hadn't you wouldn't be leaving.

If you don't think you can do that (I have faith on you) get a friend (I have Skype if needed) and practice. I'm not joking. You need to be serious and unwavering. It's your good nature that he has riden this far and it's time to stop.

"He has done nothing for me but empty my wallet and sex...and a prostitute is cheaper than him so really."

Pure. Gold. Seriously. If it goes to court say that. Write it in your "peace the .love. out" letter.   Say it in your goodbye speech. Beautiful. I might end up using this in one of my books. Like, damn.

I have faith in you. Stay strong.

[FlickerYourOwnIdentity]

If you can't get through to him, sell the collection, get custody of the kittens (because he clearly can't sustain himself and two kittens), and get out.  It's a toxic relationship that most likely won't end in something good.  Drop him like he's hot, and bounce.

Heart goes out to you man.

[MommaB]

The sad part is I don't want anything back that is of importance to him all I want is my grandfathers shelves my dragon collection my zoid collection my harrypotter collection ( very proud of the original American and British covers both hard and soft cover and the spines have never been broken) and cake things ... All bought before we meet and has no value on our relationship but he is fighting it bc the dragon collection alone is worth 40,000 (their a dimolished Hamilton collection line lol)

But he just doesn't understand I'm tired of everything and I'm not in love anymore

[FlickerYourOwnIdentity]

I've been re-reading that over and over, simultaniously deleting text to come up with a level headed response because it's getting kinda difficult with all the information presented.

First off, you have these items before the relationship, so no matter what he says, you should have the ability to take them from the house and leave as you please.  You have full 'custody' (bad word but using it anyway) of these items, so you may do with them as you please.

Second off, any items that are bought within the relationship that you would want (ie the collection) is a little tougher.  Granted you paid for the majority of it, it's still hard to pan out whose is whose.  I suppose you could sell it, but I don't know the legal ramifications that could come with it if there are any (and I don't think there are.  If someone could clarify if there are or not that would be great).

Third off, don't back ever back down from any of this.  It sounds like he is trying to guilt you into staying, and/or doing a sort of power struggle.  Trying to put you on the defensive.  Get out of there fast with all the things you want is the best I can offer in advice.

Good luck with all of this mess.

[LinkCelestrial]

Everything I wanted to say has been said. No way in hell he's getting that dragon collection.

[MommaB]

I'm very orotund of that collection it took me 400 wedding cakes to afford the pieces to it lol it's amazing... I collect things lol n nerdier the better lol .....


You guys are amazing thank for listening to problems as I said no one really does.... He is calmed down now and talk able to know and wants to settle this cleanly. He also is five jäger bombs deep so he is not as hostile lol. He has already admitted that he over reacted and is a jerk so I'm ok (loosely used term) now.

He thinks that maybe if I moved home and we go on a break that it'd be better than killing the relationship we have... IM NOT STAYING WITH HIM but if I can get my stuff and cats out safely wo a fight then end things it's better than bashing his face in on the way out the door

[LinkCelestrial]

I'm really glad to hear this. Best of luck.

[MommaB]

I'm free!!!!!! And cats are safely with me!!!!!!!

[the_intelligentleman]

I'm free!!!!!! And cats are safely with me!!!!!!!

VICTORY

[LinkCelestrial]

Day = made!

So hype!

[Kaylesh]

I'm free!!!!!! And cats are safely with me!!!!!!!

Happy for you!
I know it's a couple of weeks past, but lost track of threads... Bad excuse, but really happy for you!

[MommaB]

So everyone on here who supported me and edged me on through what this time was I thank you and appreciate it so much

To catch you up, I am now dating a new boy his name is Austin and he is meeting momma for the first time tonight and I'm supppper excited and he is kind and very respectful of me and my things

[Falcon182]

So everyone on here who supported me and edged me on through what this time was I thank you and appreciate it so much

To catch you up, I am now dating a new boy his name is Austin and he is meeting momma for the first time tonight and I'm supppper excited and he is kind and very respectful of me and my things

Positive change. Nice work!

[FlickerYourOwnIdentity]

Congratulations!  Best of wishes to the both you

[Kaylesh]

Glad to hear it!